1
I believe that every girl has had fantasies about her future lover since adolescence. She hopes that he will be a prince charming, a great hero, a rich CEO, a tall, rich, handsome, and a great big shot.
In addition, whether in novels or movies, the male protagonist is portrayed as a very perfect character, causing many girls to have too high expectations for their boyfriends before falling in love.
After I really fell in love, I found that my boyfriend was not as good as I imagined and always had various shortcomings. So I was very picky, which caused various conflicts, and finally led to a hasty breakup.
In fact, no one in the world is perfect. They all have various shortcomings. As long as it is not a matter of principle, we should learn to be tolerant and considerate. After all, we are not perfect and have shortcomings.
We always easily see our own strengths but fail to see our own shortcomings.
In life, many girls often fail to recognize the reality and focus on their boyfriend’s minor flaws and problems every day, thus destroying a good relationship.
2
Xiaoni is beautiful and has a good family background. She has had many suitors since high school, and the boys are also very good in all aspects, and they are also infatuated with her.
She dated more than a dozen boyfriends, but none of them lasted long. They broke up in a week at the fastest and two years at the slowest.
Seeing that her friends around her were all getting married and having children, with loving couples and well-behaved children, her relationship had not yet settled, and she couldn't help but feel anxious.
She believed that she had too many rotten peach blossoms, so she could not achieve enlightenment. She even went to Yuelao Temple to seek marriage, hoping that she would meet the right person and get married before the age of 30.
Actually, it’s not that she hasn’t met the right person, but that she is too demanding and too picky. As soon as she discovers shortcomings in her boyfriend, she immediately becomes intolerable and chooses to break up.
These shortcomings may include loathing in bed, playing games, sleeping without brushing teeth, drinking, being unmotivated, etc. If you commit any of these shortcomings, you will feel that your boyfriend is not good enough for you and ask for a breakup.
Xiaoni’s longest-standing boyfriend is named Chen. Mr. Chen graduated with a bachelor’s degree, started his own company, and relied on his own efforts to buy a house and a car. He also has a good temper, loves to be clean, and knows how to cook.
Every aspect is excellent.
They have been dating for two years. Although they occasionally have conflicts, Mr. Chen always gives in and quickly makes Xiaoni happy.
Every time she mentions her boyfriend to her friends and relatives, she is full of love and praises him endlessly.
It was rare to see her praising her boyfriend so much, and everyone was happy for her, thinking that her love would finally blossom and bear fruit.
3
Xiaoni felt that Mr. Chen was the person she wanted to marry, so the two met their parents and planned to get married on National Day.
But not long after, Xiaoni broke up with her because she found that Mr. Chen didn't like pets and was impatient with his pet cat. She thought he lacked love and was too cold and hard.
Everyone heard that they broke up just for this reason and tried to persuade her, but she just didn't listen.
Mr. Chen was reluctant to let their relationship end, and promised that he would learn to take care of her cat in the future.
She is still determined not to get back together.
Later, Mr. Chen went on a blind date and got married, while Xiaoni went around and had several relationships, but there was still no result.
In fact, she mentioned to her best friend that Mr. Chen is the best boyfriend she has ever had, but why is he not unloving and doesn't like pets?
Haha, there are so many reasons why. People eat whole grains, have seven emotions and six desires, and also have advantages and disadvantages.
Some people like animals, and some people don’t. This doesn’t mean anything.
The most important thing is that Xiaoni has a knot in her heart and is obsessed with finding the one hundred percent perfect person.
Unfortunately, she will never be able to find such a person.
4
Xiao Qiao's emotional analysis:
Once upon a time, Plato asked his teacher what is love?
Socrates asked Plato to go to the wheat field and pick up the biggest and best wheat ear and come back. He could only pick up one ear and leave without looking back.
As a result, Plato came back empty-handed, and Socrates asked him why.
Plato explained: He saw many big and good wheat ears in the wheat field, and he thought that he would encounter bigger and better wheat ears later, so he didn't pick one until he walked out of the wheat field.
Socrates then told Plato that this is love.
The reason why Xiaoni dated more than a dozen men and all ended up breaking up is because she always thought she would meet a better and more perfect boyfriend.
What she fears most is that she will waste her years. The older she gets, the worse the conditions of the men she meets, and she will end up alone.
I can understand Xiaoni’s thoughts, but as mortals, we need to recognize the reality clearly.
Because, in good love, two lovers can see each other’s strengths and know how to appreciate and encourage each other. In bad love, the couple only cares about each other's shortcomings and always blames and slanders each other.
Good love is not afraid of differences in personality and culture between couples, but it is afraid of being unable to face tolerance and acceptance.
So when we find that the person we are dating is not as good as we imagined and has shortcomings, big and small, we must know how to think and distinguish.
If it is not principled, we should respect and accept it and get along well with each other.
Because instead of finding a perfect partner, it is better to slowly get along with your lover and find a suitable and comfortable way of getting along.